When most people think about “style,” they think about how something looks.

The color.
The wallpaper.
The sofa.

And while those things matter—they’re only part of the picture.

Your Soul Style is not just a visual aesthetic. It’s made up of two things:

Your aesthetic — the things that make you feel alive
Your lifestyle — the things you love to do

Both are essential. And together, they are what create a home that not only looks beautiful—but actually feels right to live in.

Why Lifestyle Comes First

Here’s where it gets interesting.

Most people have at least some sense of their aesthetic. They know what they’re drawn to—certain colors, moods, or images that feel like them.

But lifestyle is quieter. It hides in the background.

It’s not what you say you like. It’s what you actually do.

Do you love to cook—or do you love to order in and relax?
Do you gather people often—or crave quiet, private space?
Do you need things organized and efficient—or layered and sensory and immersive?

This is where so many design decisions quietly go wrong.

Because that white sofa you love in the magazine? It might be perfect for your aesthetic… but completely misaligned with your life—your kids, your dog, your habits, your rhythms.

And when aesthetic and lifestyle are out of sync, the home never quite works.

A truly soulful home is one where these two things are in alignment.

Your lifestyle reflects what makes you feel alive—and supports what you actually love to do.

Here’s a sneak peek of my lifestyle.  There are three things I love to do, which have to be reflected in my home, no matter what I do:

I love to be outdoors.

I love to do yoga.

And I love to journal and contemplate. My family are incredible artists, too, and this delights me.

So, as you can see, I need to have a home that is connected to the outdoors, which means lots of views, doors outside, and places to sit or walk on the greenway.  I also need my living spaces to be wide open, so I can claim some floor space for yoga.  Even when I write, I like to gaze outdoors, and need  lots of space to spread out and think. 

There are likewise things I don’t like to do, such as cooking (I make simple things like hummus, Greek salad, or some easy Italian recipes I’ve been carrying around since my college days studying abroad.)  My home happens to be walkable to lots of restaurants, and I love to eat out.  I don’t have a big kitchen, but I have plenty of space for doing yoga. 

That’s lifestyle -the things you love to do.  That’s where the energy comes from.

That’s why some homes feel instantly welcoming, relaxed, and alive… even if they’re not “fancy” or to your personal taste. They are being lived in in a way that feels natural and joyful.  So what things do you love to do?

Start Here: What Do You Love to Do?

Before refining your aesthetic further, I want you to pause and consider your lifestyle.

Ask yourself:

• What do I love to do when I’m not working?
• What do I wish I had more time or space to do?
• How do I actually spend my time at home?

Then look back at your magazine images.

What do you imagine yourself doing in those spaces?

Cooking?
Hosting?
Reading quietly?
Moving, creating, resting, connecting?

Write it down. Be specific.

Because these clues are already embedded in what you’re drawn to—you just haven’t named them yet.

Lifestyle Through the Lens of Soul Style

Each Soul Style carries a lifestyle energy within it:

• Traditional → rooted in connection: family, gatherings, rituals, home as a hub
• Modern → rooted in freedom: space, light, exploration, flexibility
• Practical → rooted in purpose: function, organization, making, doing
• Sensual → rooted in nurture: atmosphere, texture, relaxation, experience

There is a lifestyle component of each of these.  Which ones do you resonate with?

Where This Is Going

Once you begin to see your lifestyle clearly, something clicks.

Your decisions get easier.
Your priorities get sharper.
Your home starts to take shape in a way that actually supports your life.

From here, we’ll circle back to your aesthetic—with fresh eyes—and begin to refine both together.